Are You Single?
September 28, 2019
You know what’s funny? I wrote the story about the Aunty matchmaker, and then another person decides to play matchmaker. What are the odds, right? Quite common, apparently, if you are single in your mid-twenties. I try to let it not bother me, which is why I write about it! Writing is a way for me to de-stress and let go of my frustrations. But at the same time, it gets tiresome having to repeat the same thing over and over again. What do y’all say to those “well intentioned” people in your lives that “just want to see you happy and settled?” Let me know in the comments below!
The story I want to share with you this week came up as a bit of a surprise to me. I went on a trip to visit Mount Washington, New Hampshire this weekend with my cousins. As usual, I left the packing until the night before we left. I don’t know what it is, but there is just something calming about packing at 2 AM when the rest of the house has gone to sleep, and I am able to just calming think about what I need. Anyway, it was just about midnight when I got a message from Lenny, a friend from college. It wasn't Lenny messaging me that was the unusual part; we stayed in touch after he graduated and we both moved on with our respective academics and careers. It wasn't even his late-night message that was unusual; he sometimes works night shifts, so I would get messages from him at random hours of the day. No, what was unusual was his message: “Hey, are you single?”
Now, I am not one to jump to conclusions (total lie, I ALWAYS jump to conclusions), but what was I supposed to make of that? No context, no introduction, not even useless small talk! He knew I read the message, and I knew he was waiting for a response, but what am I supposed to say? Yes, I am single, but why do you need to know that? Are you interested in me? Are you trying to ask me out? Is this some sort of practical joke?
I think it is worth mentioning that back in college Lenny did have a little crush on me. So my conclusions were not completely off base. But nothing ever happened. When we met, I was dating someone else. And after my ex and I broke up, Lenny did not say anything or try to make a move. Granted, after the break-up, I was in a weird place where I was at my best and worst at the same time. So I was not looking to be with anyone anyway. Since then, things have always been platonic and civil. So why, out of the blue, had Lenny suddenly messaged me?
You already know because I said it at the beginning! Turns out he has a Mallu co-worker who is a “great guy” and thought the two of us “could work.” Lenny reached out to me first because he was not sure if I had a boyfriend or if this would have been completely pointless. I think it is also worth noting that we are not close friends. We do not catchup every week, plan vacations together, or know each other’s mother’s maiden names. We are more of the type that likes photos that come up on our newsfeed, comment on a snapchat story, will message “hey what’s up?” just to respond three hours later with “oh you know, life.” So it is completely fair that he did not know about my romantic life. Besides, even if I had a romantic life, I am not the type to post it all over social media, just semi-anonymously on a public website.
What do I know about this mysterious guy, you might ask? Almost nothing. I know his name is Lucas and that the two of them went to the same school, but different years, and now work at the same place. I did not ask Lenny too much about him; I sure as hell was not about to bring out my whole m4marry requirements and run down the list with him. Did I mention that Lenny was white? I figured it was best to get my information straight from the horse’s mouth rather than have a messenger relay my inquiries back and forth. I do not expect Lenny to know what denomination Lucas is, or what his family name is, or if he thinks his life is jovial (reference from “You’ve Received an Interest”).
I did ask Lenny if Lucas knew what he, Lenny, was doing. Under what authority was Lenny acting upon? Is Lucas even looking for someone? Unfortunately, these answers were not to my liking. Lenny decided just to take it upon himself to play matchmaker, I called him a nosy Aunty for it. I did not get a straight answer for whether Lucas was even looking for someone or not. But Lenny seemed pretty confident that we would make a good match.
With all these uncertainties and unknowns, why did I say it was okay for Lenny to give Lucas my number? The short answer is that I am a hopeless romantic and I love a good story. But the longer answer is that was how my parents got together. My dad's friend was the one who set my parents up. What a beautiful way for the universe to find balance in repeating the cycle again? Did I mention I was a hopeless romantic? Despite my protests and “stubbornness,” I do want to have that Bollywood, fairy tale story - or a realistic version of it.
So what’s next? Well, since I gave the green light, Lenny said he will talk to Lucas next week, or whenever they work the same shift again, and see what he thinks. I hope he texts me. I am a logical person and I know the chances of this working out are slim, but I am curious to know what he thought of this whole thing. I will keep you updated on this as it develops. So, until next week!
- Aemi
